suicidal thoughts

Marshmallow_51920 🇯🇴

4 months ago

Feeling Confused

TRIGGER WARNING ‼️ What's the point of life? There's no point. Like, there's literally no point of life. Like, why do we- why do we even exist? I can't- I don't understand. Why? It's just really confusing, and it makes me feel like- like, what's the point of everything? Why are we here? Why? Is an

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TRIGGER WARNING ‼️

What's the point of life? There's no point. Like, there's literally no point of life. Like, why do we- why do we even exist? I can't- I don't understand. Why? It's just really confusing, and it makes me feel like- like, what's the point of everything? Why are we here? Why? Is anything real? I just don't know anymore. Atheist people kill themselves because they don't see the value of life, okay? I'm, like, Muslim, kinda, and I just don't see the point of life either. I just, like, why shouldn't people kill themselves? They're gonna die anyway. Everyone's gonna die anyway. It's like being trapped. Nothing feels real or valuable or anything. I just- I feel like I shouldn't exist. I feel so weird. I feel like no one likes me, so what's the point of even existing? I know you're gonna say, oh, there's people who love you and do stuff, but, like, life goes on. I'm gonna die anyway. And, like, I'm just gonna leave them before they leave me. I'm, like, I'm a scared cat. Like, I wouldn’t do that, actually, but I'm, like, I just- I just think about it a lot. Being- I don't know. I don't even know if I'm in the dark spot. I'm just confused. I don't know shit. I- I really don't know anything anymore. Really second thinking everything I've ever believed in. And it's exhausting. I wish- I was just clueless and never- never learned anything. And I'm just- I'm just- I'm just being clueless is a privilege. Knowing shit is fucking exhausting. And being surrounded of people that think I'm- I believe in something just like them when I don't actually is fucking exhausting. I hate pretending, and I can't stop pretending. I simply can't. If I stop pretending, everyone's gonna leave me. I'm gonna be alone forever. I don't even know what I believe in. I'm exhausted. I'm so exhausted. Like, I'm exhausted. Thinking about it is exhausting. I don't know what's going on with me. My head is a mess. It's- oh my gosh. What is a dark spot? Am I in a dark spot? I don't know. I just feel like you do this for attention and literally no one knows about that. I'm always thinking about my feelings again. Like, I feel it's not real like I'm pretending for attention because I've- I've always done that because I really wanted attention. But I don't know if I do it right now for attention or not. I don't want to be that person. I hate being seen as an attention seeker. Like, it's embarrassing. It's so embarrassing. I just feel so lonely in this. It's so lonely. I don't- I- I just don't believe anything anymore. I do believe there is a God, but I don't know anything else. It's just like- I'm so lost. So lost. I don't know. I'm so lost. It's exhausting and it's- and it sucks. Like, so much- there's so much going on. I don't know. Like, I don't know what to do. Like, having so many mental issues and having to study and having to pretend is too much. I can't do all of that, but I'm still doing it. If my parents found out that I think that way, they're gonna be really, really disappointed. They shouldn't be disappointed though, because I was trying to learn and I was trying to, like, see things from different angles. And it wasn't even intentional. And I just- I don't know. I don't know what I am. I'm just so lost and I hope and I wish I weren't. I wish I'd never saw that video. I wish I'd never- I wish I'd never saw that video. I wish I was- I was never born. I wish I was a star or a fucking fly that, Like you’d, kill, Because it was too annoying. I wish I was something not someone.

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Grape_20524 🇪🇬

11 months ago

Feeling Exhausted

Why does my mother always doubt me when I go anywhere? No one tells me that she is afraid for me, but rather she doubts me. She even doubts my friends as if we did something. I am really bored and I want to commit suicide in order to get rid of all this doubt. Every time I come back from class, she

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